Personality Boundary Test. Day III
Any state has borders. A person, metaphorically, is the same state that has its own boundaries and its own internal laws, and also has protection from encroachors. Remember Perls' famous saying:
I do my job, and you do yours. I do not live in this world to live up to your expectations. And you do not live in this world to live up to mine.
You are you, and I am me.
And if we happen to find each other, that's great.
If not, it cannot be helped.
It's about built personal boundaries. How to understand that your personal boundaries have been broken? And you will feel this due to discomfort, you will feel discontent or even indignation, and your feelings will prompt you that an "enemy" has entered. For example, such markers can indicate a hack:
- Guests have arrived, just acquaintances, not relatives. They stay at your home without prior notice or invitation.
-Family members (parents, spouse or spouse, children) have a habit of reading your correspondence, reaching into your pockets or purse, looking at your phone.
- Neighbors keep track of when and where you go, when you come, what you buy in the store.
The following test will help you understand how clearly the boundaries of your personality are built.
Your personality boundaries (test)
When answering the question, give yourself 5 points for the answer "never", 4 - "rarely", 3 - "sometimes", 2 - "often" and 1 - "always".
So, we started:
1. It is difficult for me to define what I want.
2. In every unpleasant situation for me, I try to find the pluses, instead of just worrying.
3. I quite often change my views and plans, as I try to please others.
4. I have a feeling that the more I do for others, the less satisfaction I get.
5. I consider other people's opinions more than my own.
6. All the time it seems to me that something good is about to happen.
7. I think that I have no right to hide something from others ..
8. I observe the behavior of others and reflect on it.
9. I maintain relationships with people with whom it is unpleasant for me to communicate.
10. If I am offended by another person's behavior, it seems to me that I myself am the cause and apologize.
11. I easily succumb to flattery.
12. I rely on people to take care of me.
13. I cannot refuse and fulfill the request, even if it gives me discomfort.
14. It is very difficult for me to put in the place of a person who offends me or someone from my loved ones.
15. I am often treated with disdain and offended.
16. I know the feeling of anger.
17. I only help others because I believe that you always need to help.
18. I am afraid and do not understand what I need to do.
19. It seems to me that I am not in my power to change something in my life.
20. I feel like I'm living someone else's life.
If you scored no more than 40 points, then you urgently need to start building your personal boundaries.
It turns out that there are people with blurred personal boundaries. They are very dependent on others. It is generally accepted that criminals have also erased personal boundaries. These people are terribly uncomfortable and do not understand why. Because they are trying to conquer other people's personal states, or someone conquered their own personal states, turning them into their slaves.
And why did the criminals have their boundaries erased and what is the root cause - the boundaries erased from childhood and subsequent crimes, or were there first crimes that erased the boundaries?
What comes first?
Do you know the answer to this question?
My light, MIRROR ... (Tests for high school students)
Methodology "The house in which you" live ""
(Techniques for character diagnostics are used from the source: Psychological tests for teenagers. / Compiled by T.V. Orlova. - Kiev: OOO Tair, 1997. - 190 p. (Popular psychology)
A drawing, created without hesitation by a person, can largely reveal his character. Character - a set of mental traits of a person as a result of his temperament and upbringing, the direction of his will and mind. To find out some of the features of your character, draw the most ordinary house on a piece of paper.
Interpreting Results
Small, low house. A person who paints a house with a very low roof, most likely, feels tired, tired, likes to remember the past.
Multi-storey building. He is usually drawn by a dry, withdrawn person dealing with his own problems.
Lock. Such a drawing reveals something childish in character, frivolous, frivolous. It means that a person has too much imagination and isolation from real life.
Window. A huge window most likely speaks of openness, cordiality, friendliness. One or more small windows, windows with bars, shutters - an indicator of secrecy, the presence of complexes, greed, inability to neither give nor receive anything from others.
Doors. If they are located in the middle of the facade, it speaks of friendliness, hospitality. And the porch is about even greater generosity, a sense of self-confidence. An open door means sociability. Closed - isolation. If the door closes almost the entire facade, this indicates frivolity, unpredictability in actions, but also about generosity.
The absence of a pipe in the drawing is a sign of insensitivity. A chimney that doesn't produce smoke means the same thing, but this character trait is caused, no doubt, by a number of disappointments in life. A chimney with smoke is a sign of generosity, and if, moreover, even bricks are drawn on the chimney, then this indicates vital optimism.
Method "Your color and your character"
Most people prefer one color, at least no more than two or three (depending on where these colors are used: in clothing, decor, etc.). The answer to the question "What is your favorite color?" can reveal the secrets of character, emotional makeup of the personality. Of course, it cannot be denied that the pleasant or unpleasant feeling that a particular color evokes can change over time. After all, we ourselves are changing ...
White is a synthesis of all colors, so it is the ideal color, the “dream color”. It has a significant meaning, since it simultaneously conveys the brilliance of light and the coldness of ice. A person with any character can give preference to this color, he does not repulse anyone.
Black is opposed to white. This is the color of uncertainty, symbolizes a gloomy perception of life. This is the color of maximalism, criticism, judgment. Those who prefer to dress in black often perceive life in dark colors, are insecure, unhappy, prone to depression, because they have no doubts that ideals are unattainable in life. The frequent change of a black suit or dress to another, brighter one is an indicator that pessimistic moods are dissipating.
Gray is the favorite color of judicious and distrustful natures who think for a long time before making any decision. It is also a neutral color preferred by those who are afraid to announce themselves too loudly. If you don't like this color, then this is an indicator of an impulsive, frivolous character.
Red is the color of passions. If this is a favorite color, then such a person is a bold, strong-willed, domineering type, quick-tempered, sociable. Besides, an altruist. People who are irritated by this color have an inferiority complex, fear of quarrels, a tendency to privacy, stability in relationships.
Orange is a favorite color for intuitive people and passionate dreamers.
Brown and all its shades (earth color) are preferred by those who firmly and confidently stand on their feet. People who have a weakness for him value traditions, family. When he is unpleasant, it speaks of selfishness and egoism, that this person is secretive, with difficulty goes to frankness.
Yellow symbolizes calmness, ease in relations with people, intelligence. When he is loved, it means sociability, curiosity, courage, easy adaptability and the ability to enjoy the opportunity to be liked and attract people to him. When he is unpleasant, then we are talking about a focused, pessimistic person, with whom it is difficult to establish an acquaintance.
Salad is the color of misanthropes and cynics. He only likes powerful people who seek to impose their will on others, but they themselves are afraid to act so as not to get into a difficult situation.
Pink is the color of life, of all living things, it speaks of the need to love and be kinder. Those who like him can get excited about any, the most insignificant reason. For pragmatic people, this color causes irritation.
The purple color speaks of a very high emotionality, sensitivity, high spirituality and delicacy. When he is unpleasant, this is a sign of a developed sense of duty, a desire to live only in the present. This is a typical color for harmoniously developed people.
Blue. Since this is the color of the sky, it is usually associated with the spiritual elevation of a person, his purity. If you like him, it speaks of modesty and melancholy; such a person often needs to rest. He quickly and easily gets tired, it is extremely important for him a sense of confidence, the benevolence of others. In rejection of this color, a person is revealed who wants to give the impression that he can do everything in the world. But, in essence, he is a model of insecurity and isolation. Indifference to this color speaks of a well-known frivolity in the field of feelings, hidden under the mask of courtesy.
Green is the color of nature, nature, life itself, spring. Anyone who prefers him is afraid of someone else's influence, looking for a way to assert himself, since this is vital for him. Anyone who does not love him is afraid of everyday problems, the vicissitudes of fate, in general - all difficulties.
Test "What is your creativity?"
(Potemkina O.F., Potemkina E.V. Tests for adolescents. - M .: ACT-PRESS KNIGA, 2006. - 320 p. S. 92-96.)
Instruction. Choose one of the suggested answers to the following questions and statements.
1. Do you think the world around you can be improved?
b) no, he is already good enough;
c) yes, but only in something.
2. Do you think that you yourself can participate in significant changes in the world around you?
a) yes, in most cases;
c) yes, in some cases.
3. Do you think that some of your ideas would make significant progress in the area of \u200b\u200bactivity in which you intend to work?
b) yes, under favorable circumstances;
c) only to some extent.
4. Do you think that in the future you will play such an important role that you can fundamentally change something in your life and in the lives of others?
a) yes, for sure;
b) it is unlikely;
c) possible.
5. When you decide to take an action, do you think you will make it happen?
b) often think that you will not be able to;
c) yes, often.
6. Do you feel like doing something that you absolutely do not know?
a) yes, the unknown attracts you;
b) the unknown does not interest you;
c) it all depends on the nature of the case.
7. You have to deal with unfamiliar business. Do you feel the desire to achieve perfection in it?
b) you are satisfied with what you have achieved;
c) yes, but only if you like it.
8. If you like a business that you do not know, do you want to know everything about it?
b) no, you want to learn only the most basic;
c) no, you only want to satisfy your curiosity.
9. When you fail, then:
a) persist for some time contrary to common sense;
b) give up on this venture, because you understand that it is unreal;
c) keep doing your thing, even when it becomes obvious that the obstacles are insurmountable.
10. In your opinion, the profession should be chosen based on:
a) their capabilities, proper prospects for themselves;
b) stability, significance, the need for the profession, the need for it;
c) the benefits that it will provide.
11. When traveling, could you easily navigate the route you have already taken?
b) no, you are afraid to go astray;
c) yes, but only where the area you liked and remembered.
12. Immediately after some conversation, can you remember everything that was said?
a) yes, without difficulty;
b) you cannot remember everything;
c) remember only what interests you.
13. When you hear a word in an unfamiliar language, can you repeat it syllables, without error, without even knowing its meaning?
a) yes, without difficulty;
b) yes, if this word is easy to remember;
c) repeat, but not quite right.
14. In your free time, you prefer:
a) stay alone, reflect;
b) be in the company;
c) you do not care whether you will be alone or in a company.
15. You are doing something. You decide to stop this activity only when:
a) the case is over and it seems to you perfectly completed;
b) you are more or less satisfied;
c) you have not managed to do everything yet.
16. When you are alone:
a) love to dream about some, maybe even abstract things;
b) trying to find a specific occupation at any cost;
c) sometimes love to dream, but about things related to your work.
17. When an idea captures you, then you begin to think about it:
a) no matter where and with whom you are;
b) you can only do this alone;
c) only where it will not be too noisy.
18. When you defend an idea:
a) you can refuse it if you listen to convincing arguments of your opponents;
b) stay with your opinion, no matter what arguments you listen to;
c) change your mind if the resistance is too strong.
Calculate the points you have accumulated as follows:
for the answer "a" - 3 points;
for the answer "b" - 1 point;
for the answer "c" - 2 points.
Questions 1, 6, 7, 8 define the limits of your curiosity; questions 2, 3, 4, 5 - belief in yourself; questions 9 and 15 - consistency; question 10 - ambition; questions 12 and 13 - auditory memory; question 11 - visual memory; question 14 - your desire to be independent; questions 16, 17 - the ability to abstract; question 18 - the degree of concentration.
These abilities are the qualities of creativity. The total of the points scored will show the level of your creativity.
49 or more points. You have a lot of creativity that gives you a wealth of creative options. If you can actually apply your abilities, then a wide variety of forms of creativity are available to you.
24 to 48 points. You have quite good creativity. You have the qualities that allow you to create, but you also have problems that hinder the creative process. In any case, your potential will allow you to express yourself creatively, if, of course, you so desire.
23 or less points. Alas, your creative potential has not yet gained strength, and it needs to be developed. But maybe you just underestimate yourself, your abilities? Lack of faith in yourself can lead you to think that you are not capable of creativity at all. Get rid of these thoughts and thus solve the problem.
Character: Psychogeometric test
Character is an individual stable system of habitual ways of human behavior. Translated from ancient Greek means: "imprint", "distinctive feature", "sign", "omen", "feature". Character is mostly the result of upbringing and self-education. Unlike temperament, which is largely due to innate qualities, character develops mainly throughout life, under the influence of communication with other people.
(Gretsov A.V., Azbel A.A. Get to know yourself. Psychological tests for adolescents. - SPb .: Peter, 2006. - S. 31-34.)
Instruction. Look at five shapes. Choose from them the one in relation to which you can say: "This is me!" Just do not engage in any logical analysis and speculation. Just try to feel your shape. If you are experiencing severe difficulty, choose from the figures the one that first attracted attention when you looked at the page with their image. Write its name under number 1. From the remaining four figures, again choose the closest one and write down its name at number 2. And so number all five figures. Please try not to think twice!
Figure: 3. Stimulus material for the "psychogeometric test"
Interpretation of results.
Having numbered the figures, read the psychological characteristics with which their choice is usually correlated. The characteristics associated with the figures you chose under No. 1 and No. 2 are most applicable to you. As for the characteristics associated with the figure you chose last, these are the traits you reject. Most likely, it will be quite difficult for you to communicate with people in whom they are actively manifested.
Table 5
Interpretation of the results of the psychogeometric test
Psychological properties
Positive
Negative
Organized
Attentive to the details
Hardworking
Rational, prudent
Erudite
Persistent, persistent
Solid in decisions
Patient
Thrifty
Pedant, meticulous, petty
From behind the trees he does not see the forest
Hard worker
Cold, aloof
Overly cautious
Not a very rich fantasy
Conservative, reluctant
Expectant, delaying decisions
Triangle
Leader Leading
Taking responsibility for himself
Resolute
Goal-focused
Essence-oriented
Competitive, aiming to win
Confident
Ambitious
Vigorous
Selfish, egocentric
Impatient, interrupts others
Cunning, cunning
Arrogant
Status oriented, career oriented
Unstoppable
Rectangle
Excited, active
Curious
Easily absorbing new things
Sensitive, without unnecessary ambition
Tense in a state of confusion
Inconsistent, inconsistent
Gullible, suggestible
Emotionally unstable
Low self-esteem
Reckless
Friendly, benevolent
Good-natured
Caring
Supportive
Devotee
Sympathetic
Generous
Is able to convince others
Confiding
Calm
Reflexive (prone to self-awareness)
Conflict-free
Undemanding
Yielding
Careless
Intrusive
Talkative
Intrusive
Chatty, likes to gossip
Self-incriminating tendency
Wastefulness
Plays on the feelings of others
Gullible
Not really striving for achievements
Indecisive
Weak "politician"
Creative approach to life
Theoretical setting
Dreaminess, focus on the future
Intuitiveness
Wit
Expressiveness
Striving for novelty
Enthusiasm, inspiration
Disorganization
Impracticality
Unrealistic
Illogical, inconsistent
Eccentricity
Intemperance, immediacy
Inconsistency of mood, behavior and relationships
Naivety
Pay attention to the fact that the columns "Positive" and "Negative" sometimes talk about very similar psychological characteristics, simply expressed in different words (firm in decisions - stubborn, generous - wasteful, etc.).
In fact, in fact, these psychological characteristics are very close, but whether they are positive or negative depends on how exactly they manifest themselves and how much they correspond to external conditions. And also on how others and the person himself relate to them.
Methodology "Draw your own character"
(Psychology: Textbook of the V grade. / Under the editorship of IV Dubrovina. - M .: Moscow Psychological and Social Institute; Voronezh: MODEK, 2000. - S. 226-231.)
Instruction. Fill in each of the suggested squares, completing the images as you wish. Don't think too long about the assignment. Unleash your imagination.
Figure: 4. Incentive material for the "Let's draw our character" method
Processing and interpretation of results.
Now let's see what happened.
1. The picture in the first square shows how you feel about yourself. If you have drawn something funny or a smiling face, then this indicates a good attitude towards yourself and a sense of humor. If you have drawn the sun, you often want to be the main one, the leader. A flower means that you pay a lot of attention to your appearance. Eye - you are a proud person, you strive to control yourself and other people.
2. Drawing in the second square. If you have drawn something only in a small square, it means that you are a homebody, you like home comfort. If the drawing is in a large square, then you are interested in the world around you. If the drawing is in both large and small squares, then your interests are harmoniously distributed between the house and the surrounding world.
3. Third square. An arrow hitting a target means that you are able to work hard towards your goal. If you have drawn several arrows or lines, then you do not know what goal you want to achieve. If you have drawn something that does not look like arrows and a target, then you are a seeker, rebellious person.
4. Fourth square. If a lot of figures or drawings are drawn in this square, then this means that you like to communicate and most likely you have many friends. If you have drawn only one line, then, most likely, you are a secretive, closed, reserved person. If you portrayed a brick, then you tend to be capricious, to doubt everything. Or are you a whiner?
5. The fifth square. If you drew something that looks like a building, a lamppost, an animal's neck (that is, your drawing depicts one thing, and its lines are closed), then you have a calm, friendly character. If you left blank space between two vertical lines, and shifted the drawing to the right or left, then you are shy, modest. If you get a tree, it means that you value your home, your family most of all. If you depicted fruits on a tree, then this means that you really love small children.
6. Sixth square. If the main thing in your drawing is a given element, then you have a rare ability to quickly and easily win over strangers. If you drew something completely different, for example, an angular geometric pattern, then most of all you value independence and independence.
7. Seventh square. The drawing above the wavy line located in the middle indicates that you are confident in yourself, you feel confident, and if under the wavy line, then you do not believe in yourself. By depicting a sinking object, you show that you are worried about your future. A drawing in the form of a chain, an ornament indicates that you are able to work hard, are responsible, but are too sensitive to mistakes.
8. Eighth square. What you depicted in the empty square means the circle of your interests. If you left the square empty, then you are probably bored with life. Try to get interested, get carried away with something, find yourself some fun activity.
9. Ninth square. If you supplement the drawn black square with other squares or other geometric shapes so that you get a symmetrical pattern, then you are disciplined, organized, and work well with others. If you get a picture with curved lines, asymmetrical and not similar to the correct geometric construction, then this indicates that you are not inclined to recognize authorities, are stubborn and persistent.
10. Tenth square. If you just closed circles, then you constantly need protection and support, you prefer not to decide anything on your own. If you have not closed circles, you are an independent person with a purpose in life. Drawing in the form of a human ear speaks of a secretive nature. If the drawing made you think of the handle of the cup, then you like taking care of small children, of the house.
11. Eleventh square. If you perceive the drawing as an element of any board game, then this means assertiveness of character, love of competition. If the drawing somehow resembles a house, this indicates thrift.
12. Twelfth square. If you used dots as an integral part of the picture (ants, a hare's tail, grains that birds peck, etc.), this indicates that you have a good imagination, a rich imagination. If you blur the dots and connect them in a circle, this indicates logical thinking and a practical mindset.
Test "Road to the mountains"
(Derekleeva N.I. Modular course of educational and communicative motivation of students or Learning to live in the modern world. - M .: VAKO, 2006. - 128 p. - S. 57-59.)
What we choose, what actions we do in accordance with the choice, depends on our attitude towards ourselves and towards the people around us. If you want to know your attitude towards yourself, towards people, then you are invited to take a trip to the mountains. The imaginary path will have five stops.
Description of the game
Your friend lives in the mountains. Today is a day off, he invited you and your friends to visit. You decided that it would be useful to take a walk. In addition, the places where you live are very hot, and I would like to visit where it is cool. You get into your car, pick up your friends and hit the road together.
FIRST STOP
Part of the road is very bad, in front there is a big hole full of water.
Choice options:
1) you manage to go around the hole, and you continue on your way;
2) you are stuck in a hole. It is impossible to get out without help. We'll have to wait for someone to pull it out.
SECOND STOP
An oncoming car pulled you out and you're on the freeway. It's noon on the clock. Friends ask to speed up, the car is very hot. You want to speed up and show the capabilities of the car.
Choice options:
1) you abandon this idea for fear of road accidents;
2) you succumb to the persuasion of friends and press the gas. But on the road, a traffic police officer and you are fined for speeding.
THIRD STOP
Your mood is completely spoiled, and the road is getting steeper. Friends joke, laugh, demand to increase speed. Chatting with friends is annoying. You are having discomfort.
Choice options:
1) you open a window, turn on the radio, and everything passes;
2) you stop the car, step to the side of the road, looking for a corner to lie down and calm down.
FOURTH STOP
The irritation was gone, it became easier. You hit the road, a mountain road, fresh air, good music, jokes from friends, and suddenly there is a pop: a punctured tire.
Choice options:
1) calling on your friends for help, you change the wheel and continue on your way;
2) you are furious. The mood is hopelessly spoiled. You kick the car and hurt your leg. Until the pain subsides, you cannot hit the road.
FIFTH STOP
The road is getting steeper. A lot of time has been lost, I want to achieve my goal faster and have a little rest.
Choice options:
1) you are discussing with your friends how you can change the plan of the walk without detriment to the walk itself, yourself and your friends;
2) you decide to go faster, but the traffic police are not asleep ... A fine, unpleasant explanations, a quarrel with friends.
Reflection of the game
1. Does the road you were driving resemble our life?
2. Is it possible to live life without obstacles and failures?
3. How to treat them?
4. How does this game relate to the topic of our conversation?
Each stop offers two options:
1) answer option - 10 points;
2) answer option - 5 points.
Analysis of results
If you scored from 40 to 50 points, then this suggests that even in a game situation you do not get tired of thinking about your actions. You understand that each of your actions is the result of your attitude to yourself, people and the world. You realize that any of your actions have certain consequences for you, and you do as your mind tells you.
When you perform certain actions, you reflect on the consequences of them not only for yourself, but also for other people.
If you learn to reason in a game situation, then in life you will avoid losses and mistakes that await you on the way.
If you scored from 30 to 40 points, then you think that you can live without thinking about the consequences of your actions. It's very difficult for you to make your own decisions. Very often, an act done thoughtlessly causes remorse, but, unfortunately, it is often too late. Sometimes you find it difficult to get along with people, to adapt to their opinions and desires. However, I really want the people around you to follow your interests and desires.
If you scored 25 points, then your behavior is a consequence of indifference towards yourself and others, which often leads to bad consequences. Unwillingness to listen to the voice of common sense, sole decision-making, thoughtlessness in relationships with people can lead to the fact that a person remains in isolation and suffers both physically and mentally.
At the end of the game, the guys calculate the points and (optionally) talk about their choice.
Test "How do you feel about your time?"
(Psychological tests for teenagers. / Compiled by T.V. Orlova. - Kiev: OOO Tair. 1997. -190 p.)
How can you learn to live optimally? Every person from early childhood must learn simple truths that can affect the result of his life efforts and achievements. Time is irreversible. It cannot be accumulated, bought, donated, inherited, seized, claimed. And you can learn to use them skillfully; take care of it; spend it sparingly; manage it in such a way that others understand how important and valuable it is to you.
Instruction. When answering questions, choose one of the answer options (A, B, C).
1. To get up in the morning, you:
A. start the alarm - 3;
B. rely on your family and friends - 1.
2. Waking up in the morning, you:
A. immediately jump out of bed and are going to school - 2;
B. get up without fussing, doing a warm-up, then going to school - 3;
B. knowing that you have a few minutes left, luxuriate in bed - 1.
3. At breakfast you:
A. quickly drink tea or coffee with sandwiches - 2;
B. eat a full breakfast - 3;
B. do not have breakfast - 1.
4. Do you prefer the following start of the day:
A. coming to school at the same time - 3;
B. delay - 1;
B. how it goes - 2.
5. During school lunch, you:
A. have time to have lunch before the bell - 1;
B. have time to have lunch and be in time for the lesson - 2;
B. have time to have lunch and chat during lunch with friends - 3;
6. Do you often manage to laugh at your friends?
A. every day - 1;
B. sometimes - 2;
B. rarely - 3.
7. You are in a conflict situation:
A. stubbornly defend your position - 1;
B. move away from participation in the conflict - 2;
C. clearly state your position and stop the discussion - 3.
8. After school, you stay late at school:
A. always for 20 - 3 minutes;
B. about about an hour - 2;
B. can stay long enough - 1.
9. Free time you usually:
A. spend with friends - 2;
B. give your hobbies - 3;
V. carry out as it turns out - 1.
10. Meeting friends means to you:
A. the ability to escape from worries - 3;
B. loss of time - 2;
C. problems and bad mood - 1.
11. You go to bed:
A. at about the same time - 2;
B. when how, depending on mood and school lessons - 1;
B. after finishing all cases - 3.
12. How do you spend your holidays:
A. is always interesting - 3;
B. as my parents decide - 1;
V. how it turns out - 2.
13. Talking about sports, you limit yourself to:
A. the role of a fan - 2;
B. do constantly exercises - 3;
V. do not consider sport to be vital for yourself - 1.
14. In the past two weeks, you have:
A. moved - 3;
B. went in for sports - 2;
V. were engaged in physical labor - 1.
15. When meeting with friends, you usually:
A. discuss your problems - 2;
B. go in for sports - 3;
V. go on a hike - 1.
16. You always want in any question:
A. to achieve your goal at any cost - 1;
B. to succeed through their efforts - 3;
B. to take a wait and see attitude - 2.
Processing and interpretation of results
The prevailing score is "3".
If your answers are dominated by a score of "three", this indicates that you are quite careful about your time and value it. You try to rationally allocate time between your studies, hobbies, and friends. At the same time, you try to make sure that your communication with family and friends is informal and brings satisfaction not only to you, but also to the people around you. You think that meeting friends is not a reason to complain about other people's bad attitude towards you and discuss their problems, but an opportunity to have fun, talk about your successes, learn something, and enjoy the achievements of others. You are on the right track not only in managing your time, but also in achieving your goals. Your experiences can help others manage their time efficiently and improve their life achievements.
The prevailing score is "2".
If the score “two” prevails in your answers, this also does not accidentally indicate that you are characterized by an indifferent attitude towards your own life. It seems that you are hesitating to start treating yourself and your time spending with respect and reason. There is a lot of irresponsibility in your actions, but sometimes you realize what you are doing wrong, you catch yourself, although your energy does not last long. Therefore, you have many defeats in your life, which are associated not only with certain circumstances, but to a greater extent with your disorganization and lack of will.
Dominant score "1"
If your answers are dominated by the point "one", then you do not control time, but time controls you.
Temporal categories are of little interest to you. You live the way you want. You are not at all interested in what losses this may result in the future. However, it is unusual for you to blame yourself for your problems; you like your friends and acquaintances to sympathize with you and feel sorry for you. This gives you food to keep doing nothing.
You try not to think about the future because it scares you! You prefer to blame others for your failures and problems, although in the deep labyrinths of your soul you realize that you are to blame.
Methods for diagnosing the degree of satisfaction of basic needs
(Raigorodsky D.Ya. Practical psychodiagnostics. Methods and tests: Textbook. - Samara: ID BAHRAKH, 1998. - S. 624-626.)
Instruction. Here are 15 statements that you must evaluate in pairs, comparing them with each other.
After comparing the 1st statement with the 2nd, 3rd, etc., write the result in the 1st column. So, if, when comparing the 1st statement with the 2nd one, you find the 2nd one preferable for yourself, then in the initial cell write the number - "2". If the 1st statement turns out to be preferable, then enter the number "1", then do the same with the 2nd statement: compare it first with the 3rd, then with the 4th, etc. and write the result in 2 th column.
Work in the same way with the rest of the statements, gradually completing the entire form.
During work, it is useful to say the phrase "I want ..." to each statement.
Stimulus material
1. Achieve recognition and respect.
2. Have warm relationships with people.
3. Secure your future.
4. Make a living.
5. Have good conversationalists.
6. Strengthen your position.
7. Develop your strength and abilities.
8. Provide yourself with material comfort.
9. To improve the level of skill and competence.
10. Avoid trouble.
11. Strive for the new and unknown.
12. Ensure yourself a position of influence.
13. Buying good things.
14. Engage in a business that requires full dedication.
15. Be understood by others.
Answer form
Processing results
A. When you are finished, count the number of choices you have for each statement.
Select the 5 claims with the highest score and arrange them in a hierarchy. These are your main needs.
B. To determine the extent to which the five major needs are being met, calculate the score for the five sections on the following questions:
1. Material needs: 4, 8, 13.
2. Security needs: 3, 6, 10.
3. Social (interpersonal) needs: 2, 5, 15.
4. Need for recognition: 1, 9, 12.
5. Needs for self-expression: 7, 11, 14.
B. Calculate the scores for each of the five sections, plot the results on the vertical axis of the graph. By points - points, build a general graph of the result, each will indicate three zones of satisfaction for five needs.
Will plays an important role in human life. You can give many definitions of this concept (Nemov R.S. General psychology: Textbook for student educational institutions of secondary professional education. - M .: VLADOS, 2003. - P. 259): will is a form of internal control of behavior on the part of a person, carried out by himself and associated with his consciousness, thinking, with conscious decision-making and their subsequent purposeful implementation; will is what is the highest level of regulation of human behavior. There are five signs that distinguish volitional behavior from weak-willed - one in the management of which the will does not actively participate. Strong-willed behavior is such that:
1) deliberately controlled by the person himself;
2) is purposeful;
3) is associated with the adoption of a decision;
4) correlates with the struggle of equivalent motives, which by themselves are not able to generate unambiguously purposeful behavior;
5) involves the application of internal efforts to implement it, that is, to overcome obstacles that arise on the way to the goal.
There are many examples of volitional personality traits. Here is one of them (Derekleeva N.I. Modular course of educational and communicative motivation of students, or Learning to live in the modern world. - M .: VAKO, 2006. - 128 p. - (Pedagogy. Psychology. Management). - P. 25 -26). The Roman youth Muzio, trying to kill the Etruscan king Porsena, who besieged Rome in 508 BC, was captured. The angry king ordered to light a fire at the altar in order to torture the young man and recognize his accomplices. Muzio proudly approached the altar and put his right hand on the fire. Continuing to talk to the king, he kept his hand on fire until it was charred. Shocked by the young Roman's act of showing the will of his nation, Porsena released him and lifted the siege from Rome. The image of Muzia, nicknamed Scovola (left-handed), entered world literature as an example of the will that conquers everything.
Test “What is your will?
(Psychology: Textbook. Grade V / Under the editorship of I.V. Dubrovina. - M .: Moscow Psychological and Social Institute; Voronezh: MODEK, 2000. - S. 223-226.)
Instruction. Please read the questions below and try to answer them truthfully. Indicate the answer with "+" in the appropriate column.
for instance
Do you like walking down the street
Are you able to complete the work you have begun if it is not interesting to you?
Is it easy for you to overcome inner resistance when you need to do something unpleasant?
When you are scolded or you quarrel with friends, can you quickly pull yourself together and objectively understand the situation?
If the doctor forbids you to eat what you love, is it difficult for you to refuse this food?
If in the evening you decide to get up earlier than usual, in the morning you will find the strength to carry out this decision?
If you are very afraid of something (for example, going to the dentist), can you easily overcome this fear and do what you need to do?
Are you a "man of your word"? Do you keep your promise, even if it takes a lot of trouble?
Are you following the daily routine?
Do you give back the books, tapes, disks you borrowed on time?
You know for sure that you will not have any other time to prepare lessons; will you start doing them even when there is a very interesting program on TV?
Will you be able to interrupt the quarrel and shut up, no matter how offensive the words of the one who quarrels with you may seem to you?
Do you fulfill requests, even if you really don't want to?
Processing of results.
Now count the points. The answer "yes" is estimated at 2 points, "sometimes" - 1 point, "no" - 0 points. Calculate the amount. Now read what your results say.
Interpretation
0-8 points. Your willpower is not going well. More often than not, you just behave the way you want, the way you like, even if it might hurt you and other people. And this speaks not only of a weak will, but also of selfishness. You often have troubles, and they are connected with the fact that you take your duties carelessly. You need to think about your character. Maybe something needs to be changed in him?
9-16 points. You have average willpower. You can overcome yourself, but often you don’t do it because you don’t want to or just laziness. Because of this, you get into trouble with your teachers, your parents, and your friends. If you want to achieve more in life, train your will.
17-24 points. Your willpower is okay. You can be relied on, you will not fail. But sometimes you may be hindered by your desire to always insist on your own, to do exactly as you see fit, even in those cases when it is not very important. This position can annoy the people around you. After all, they also have will and desires. So willpower is good, but you also need such qualities as kindness, attention to people, the ability to listen to them and change your opinion if necessary.
"Diffidence"
Purpose: to help parents understand the problems arising from the child's insecurity, to increase the effectiveness of their help to children.
Carrying out form: seminar.
Participants: parents of students from grades 1 to 5.
Preparatory work: handbook for parents "How to help your child become confident?" (Appendix 8).
Materials: the tale of K. Stupnitskaya "Little Wave".
SEMINAR PROCESS
Good evening, dear parents! Today our parenting meeting will be held in the form of a seminar, where we will try to figure out how to help a child grow up self-confident.
Every person knows the feeling of self-doubt, when you yourself seem inept, incompetent, and the future is vague. And it seems that those around you notice your inner confusion, anxiety. Uncertainty as a feeling is absolutely normal, but for some children, adolescents, adults it becomes a habitual, almost constant everyday feeling.
You say: so what? How does self-doubt get in the way?
The feeling of self-doubt, as noted by many psychologists, is an indicator of the psychological instability of the personality. Psychotherapists note the connection between mental disorders of the personality and manifestations of insecurity. It means that any difficult situation that requires the mobilization of mental resources for an insecure person can become traumatic enough to lead to the emergence of certain psychosomatic diseases. And since life is a series of situations of different difficulty, we can say that insecure people (and even more so children) are more likely to get sick.
Uncertainty is directly related to self-attitude, or, in other words, with the image of oneself. It is clear that insecure people rate their abilities and capabilities lower than they really are. They may be unhappy with their appearance, although in reality it may be wonderful. It is difficult for them to enter into close relationships, because the feeling of their own inferiority will interfere. What feelings will accompany their lives? Anxiety, doubt, shame, guilt, sadness.
If the overall picture of insecurity is so grim, you might ask, how will insecure students learn? Probably bad? It is impossible to answer this question unequivocally. There are insecure children who are embarrassed to answer in the classroom, give in to any difficulties and really study below their capabilities. But there are other insecure ones who do brilliantly, for whom the greatest fear is a blot in a notebook, a mistake, an unlearned lesson, a four. Yes, they study well. But at the cost of the strongest internal stress, and often disease.
How often do we meet with insecure people? More often than we think, as uncertainty can wear different masks. Insecurity masks are shyness and self-confidence. What are its reasons? Let's try to hear and "see" the reasons for uncertainty through the tale of K. Stupnitskaya.
Little Wave
Long ago, a Little Wave was born in the blue sea. She was slightly greenish, with a neat white comb that suited her so well. She had parents - Big Blue Waves. Sometimes they swam far from the shore, at the very horizon, sometimes they swam up to some shore. They had wave friends, adults and children.
The wave children were big mischievous. They loved to play catch-up, knocking adults off their feet. At the shore, they made a noise so loud that their perky splash was heard far, far away. Sometimes they would pick up a piece of wood or a shell and throw themselves at each other.
Our Little Wave was not like that. She seemed to everyone to be a serious and restrained girl. She never was capricious, like others, she did not make noise, whatever her elders asked for, she did, even when she did not really want to. It seemed strange to some, but most were satisfied with her, because there was no trouble with her at all. Little Wave herself also noticed that she was different from other children. She often swam to the side when other wave children started their pranks. For some reason, Little Wave was convinced that one must be obedient. Usually it was easy for her. But there were also cases when it was not easy. For example, when one day she saw how two boys-waves picked up a small fish and began to throw her around, and she could not escape from them. Little Wave then became very angry, she even wanted to hit one of them, but she immediately pulled herself up. After all, waves cannot be angry. Everyone knows that when the waves get angry, very bad things can happen, like shipwreck. There were other times when Little Wave got angry, but every time she managed to hold back. But the trouble is, Little Wave did not know that even when you hold back anger, it does not go anywhere, but remains inside you. Without noticing it, Little Wave began to grow and darken slowly.
One day her aunt sent her to carry a large board to the shore. This board was too heavy for a small wave. In addition, her favorite time was approaching - the time of sunset. She wanted to lie down and watch the sun melt into the sea and the first stars appear. But since Little Wave was obedient and did not argue with adults, she carried the board to the shore. She thought that if she hurried, she would still be in time before sunset.
At that time, other children-waves splashed near the shore. Noticing Little Wave with her burden, they decided to tease her. They grabbed the board and began to throw it over to it. Little Wave is very angry: they are having fun, and she has to complete a task, and besides, the sun has already begun to set. Finally, she managed to take the board from them and throw it ashore. Tired, she came back, but the sun had almost set. And then she felt so offended! She swam and felt that she could not calm her anger. It got bigger and bigger, and the Little Wave itself got bigger. At some point, she realized with horror that her crest had risen high, high. She was unrecognizable - she turned completely black. Everything inside tensed and hissed. Looking down, she saw the fisherman in the boat and realized that she would fall right on him. The noise inside her was growing, and suddenly she fell with a crash, scattering into a thousand splashes. The fisherman's boat broke down and was carried away into the sea. But Little Wave didn't notice it anymore. She felt amazing strength. Scattering in splashes and making noise, she reassembled. She was much stronger now than before. She turned back, grabbed the fisherman and carried him ashore. When she returned, the adult waves began to praise her for saving a man. She herself was glad of it. But even more she liked the feeling that she was now experiencing: all the anger that was in her before splashed out, and now there was a place inside for something else, and the forces that she used to spend on keeping anger in check, now returned to her. The next day, when Little Wave woke up, she wanted to run so much that, forgetting about all the prohibitions, she ran to play catch-up with the other wave children. After yesterday, she knew that sometimes it was worth doing what she wanted.
So, what knowledge about the reasons for uncertainty did this tale give us?
You are absolutely right when you say that often parents, from great love for their child, wanting to protect him from the dangers of the external world, to give him as much as possible, deprive the child of independent actions, decisions, mistakes, that is, the experience of independently overcoming difficulties. Children whose parents have achieved significant social success are in a particularly acute situation. And the child, passionately loving his parents, proud of them, involuntarily compares himself to them, feels his ineptitude even more. And gradually he gets used to living with an almost constant feeling of insecurity, which, as we have already said, in behavior can manifest itself in different ways.
Now I will read you the situations and the options for responding to them, and you will answer which behavior these options relate to: shy, confident, or overconfident.
For the second time in a row Dima asks Petya to be on duty for him in the class. Petya answers: “Can't you force someone? Or even forget about the watch, here's another problem - watch. " (Self-confident.)
Lena has recently become sad and silent, keeps away from everyone, even from Masha's best friend. Masha approaches her: “It seems to me that you are suppressed by something. Maybe we should try to discuss our situation? " (Sure.)
Marina is not satisfied with the grade on the test, she thinks that the teacher underestimated her grade. She says to the teacher, "Would you think ... If you could ... Would you agree that I deserve a higher mark?" (Shy.)
Mom promised to talk to Dad about the possibility of an interesting trip for Misha, but she still hasn’t done it: “I thought that you and I agreed that you would talk to Dad about me. But that did not happen. It seems to me that it can be done today. " (Sure.)
Lesha's neighbor behaves very noisily while self-preparing, turns around and interferes with Lesha. Lesha says to him: “Will you finally shut up? You cannot cope with such easy tasks! " (Self-confident.)
If we look at others from the positions of these masks, then how many insecure we will see around us!
How can you help your child become confident?
In conclusion, I would like to wish all parents: be sure to support and help your children, approve even for small successes and achievements. Don't be afraid to show your love for them again. This will only strengthen their confidence in their strengths and capabilities and will help in various difficult life situations.
Appendix 8
Respect his mental attitude. It happens that what the child says to the parents seems stupid. But this is not always the case. The child has the right to feel and say what he wants, as long as it does not harm others.
Show respect for intent. The child has the right to want what he wants. However, he needs to be explained that not all desires should be fulfilled immediately, and some should not be fulfilled at all.
Give unconditional love. Children need to feel that they do not need to do anything on purpose in order to earn love. It is very useful to ask yourself the question: "Am I doing everything so that the actions of my child are driven by love, and not fear?"
Help the child to feel their own worth through the development of independence. You can create a checklist of responsibilities and require fulfillment. In no case do for the child what he can already do himself, even if sometimes slowly or not very well. Support children's independent decision making.
Help to accept the teaching role of mistakes. Don't be too guarded against making mistakes. It is important to help reflect on the positive experiences that have been received. Key phrase that can help here: "Failure is a great opportunity to learn something new."
Contribute to the formation of a positive image of "I". The child must know, first of all, about his merits, and only then about his demerits. Emphasize the personal merits of children.
Let them express their feelings openly.
Help your child believe in intuition.
Reminding your child that you need him, need him, plays an important role in your life.
Allow the child to grow in accordance with their physiological and personal capabilities and abilities. He does not have to absolutely match the image desired by the parents. Often a child, passionately loving his parents, is very worried that he cannot be the way they want him to be. And from this the results of his activities only worsen.
Now, with almost anyone I talk about as a coach, they all have the same trouble. The trouble is with personal boundaries, which are in a very dire state. For obvious reasons, without these very distinctive and well-functioning boundaries, people experience significant challenges in their daily lives, relationships, and any career path. They wrote in LJ about the borders a lot and very well, so if you find button accordions in some places, call them.
I will not talk about physical boundaries in too much detail, because this is what is easiest to understand. Our body limits us from the environment by skin and mucous membranes. Accordingly, violation of the physical boundary is penetration into our body.
What are personality boundaries? This is what separates us from those around us. Where is this line drawn? In our understanding and feeling of ourselves as individuals. In fact, the border is our understanding of where is ours and where is not ours.
Of course, you can look at our boundaries of personality in different ways. It is possible globally - "this is me - this is not me." It is possible to distinguish different aspects of the personality. For example, I am in a relationship, I am religious, I am sexual, and I am creative…. I-what you want. Therefore, the boundaries can be called accordingly by your various I.
For example, your emotional boundaries are a set of feelings and reactions; your religious (spiritual) boundaries are a collection of knowledge, feelings, beliefs, expectations and experiences that relate to a religious or spiritual experience. Sexual is a set of what we consider normal and acceptable in sex.
The boundaries of our personality begin to form in infancy. At first, the child does not feel separate from his mother, but gradually he becomes more and more aware of himself as an independent being. Of course, certain aspects of our personality are formed at different times, and if a child falls into an unfavorable situation at a certain age, the formation of certain types of boundaries may be disturbed. If the child forms his personality in a dysfunctional family, then the formation of personality boundaries can be violated globally.
When the boundaries are normal and healthy, then a person feels comfortable in the world. He easily communicates, enters into relationships, breaks them off, moves from place to place, finds a new job ... and thousands of other small comfortable actions in life. Healthy boundaries are flexible. A person easily determines the level at which it is convenient and pleasant for him to communicate and whether he wants this communication. He can get closer to you, and then move away if he feels that something is wrong in the relationship.
Nina Brown identified several types of personal boundaries
- soft - immediately merge with other people
- spongy - absorb someone else's - people are not sure of themselves
-hard - equally in all situations, a person remains within their boundaries. Violators receive a tough response. On the one hand, this is not bad, but not being able to maneuver in a situation can bring problems to your personal life.
- flexible - those that can change depending on the situation.
People can break the boundaries of others by projecting their personality onto their opponent.
- blame the person for their problems (you ruined my life)
- control behavior (you shouldn't do that anymore)
- give unsolicited advice on how to be (if I were in your place ... should have been done for a long time)
- give instructions on what events to evaluate (this is dvolschina)
- give assessments of your appearance and personality (you are a fat lazy person)
In behavior, people can take your things, sit in your seat, use your money, not repay debt, manipulate you, and much more. No matter how it happens, a person whose boundaries have been invaded may experience confusion, fear, anger, frustration, try to avoid further communication.
If weak boundaries intrude into the personality quite regularly, such a person experiences quite severe stress, he cannot adequately defend himself against attacks. If we normally feel our own personality within our boundaries, friendly, then people with weak boundaries feel stupid, losers who spoil everything for themselves and are to blame for everything. Sometimes people with weak boundaries develop apathetic depression. The person feels almost paralyzed by constant invasions and cannot stop them.
The weaker a person's boundaries, the more often they attack the boundaries of others. Not because of anger, but because he does not realize that he is leaving the zone of his competence. The most persistent attackers are daffodils. Their boundaries are practically not formed, and with many loved ones they feel like one whole (as in the example of a narcissistic mother)
What signs of violation / weakness of boundaries can there be? Such people:
- With difficulty in their personality they determine what belongs to them and what to others. They often do something because “normal people / all women / real men / thinking and responsible workers do it”. Although they themselves may not only be not interested in this activity, but also dislike it in principle.
- Difficulty telling others no.
- Believe that their happiness and other feelings depend on others
- Continue relationships with people who treat them badly or whom they dislike
- They trust others because others know better and the opinion of others is more important.
- They are engaged in the affairs and problems of others, and not their own. Others spend more time than themselves.
- They find it difficult to ask for something they need.
- Can't fight back other people who may use their things or money
- Shy
- Obey the wishes of friends
- Are afraid to show their true self, try to be what they want to be
- They find it difficult to express their opinions or open their thoughts.
- Sensitive to criticism
- Can't keep secrets
- Feeling empty, jealous of others
- Invest in relationships more than they get out of them
- Feel responsible for the feelings of others
- Are often angry.
- It is difficult for them to be alone with themselves.
- With the help of speech (language) to express what we want, what we believe, etc.
- Using the truth about yourself (a lie denotes your boundaries in a place other than where they really are)
- Using sequence (said - did)
- By establishing emotional distance (if a person violates your boundaries, then distance yourself from close communication with him and involvement in his affairs)
- By setting a time frame for communication (you decide how much and when to communicate with whom)
- Law "What you sow is what you reap." You reserve the right not to communicate or limit communication with someone who treats you badly
- The law of responsibility. Everything that happens within your boundaries, your feelings, thoughts, desires, aspirations ... are under your personal responsibility. Nobody else bears any responsibility for this.
- The law of strength is to find the strength to admit problems within your boundaries and correct them as they are discovered.
- The law of respect is not penetration into other people's boundaries. If you refuse to break into others, and people will break into you less often
- The law of false motivation - you need to be aware that the psyche can find false reasons not to build boundaries. If I tell people no, they will not communicate with me. They will think badly of me.
- The law of proactivity - people with just established boundaries usually break through. They begin to express their opinion, they can behave aggressively, assertively. This period recedes after the boundaries are strengthened and the person feels safe inside them.
- The law of envy - when a person looks at others how they succeeded and how they are doing well, he sets his boundaries too far, striving for the unattainable. As a result, his personality is not able to fill all the space and the person feels inside himself a black hole into which all feelings and energy fly away.
- The Law of Activity - in order to maintain healthy boundaries and develop them, some social activity and work with oneself are necessary. The borders abandoned without attention again begin to decay and break through by others.
- The law of demonstration - by demonstrating your boundaries to others, you are showing yourself to others and reducing the possibility of accidental raids on your territory through carelessness.
There are many classifications of a person's character - by temperament, attitude towards others, perception of life. Another proposed recently american psychologist Ernst Hartman... He formalized in scientific terms what was already known at the everyday level: there are people with “thick-skinned” and “thin-skinned”. Hartman introduces the concept of "boundaries of the psyche" that separate a person from the outside world, which can be fragile or strong. In his opinion, communicating with different people every day, we constantly move our personal boundaries, keeping our partner at a distance or allowing us to come close. Thus, we protect our "I" from the world around us.
Having compiled a special question-test for the strength of psychological boundaries, Hartman tried it on two thousand people. And I came to interesting conclusions.
- People vary greatly in the thickness of their protective barriers. For some, they are very permeable, for others, everything comes as through a thick wall.
- The thickness of the protective barrier even refers to the acuity of perception of signals from the senses. For example, thin-skinned people are more likely to suffer from loud sounds and bright light.
- The psyche of women, as a rule, is less protected than the psyche of men.
- People with thinner barriers are more suspicious and more likely to have interesting, vivid, memorable dreams.
- People with denser boundaries of the psyche marry more easily, but receive less pleasure from its carnal joys.
- We all have "skin" thickens with age.
- People with thin boundaries of the psyche are creative individuals. They tend to change their views under the influence of experience. Their mood often changes for no apparent reason. These are not necessarily mentally unstable individuals, and they are no more susceptible to mental illness than others. But having very thin barriers can be dangerous.
- On the other hand, a person with too thick boundaries of the psyche often have difficulty in contacting others.
- Differences on this basis appear in 3-4 years. But much depends on life experience and the ability to defend against the outside world.
TEST
Rate the fidelity of each statement in relation to yourself on the following scale:
A - completely wrong;
B - more likely false than true;
C - sometimes;
D - rather true than false;
E - this is totally about me.
1. My feelings imperceptibly flow into one another.
2. It is very easy for me to remember my childhood feelings.
3. I am easily hurt or hurt.
4. I spend a lot of time on dreams and fantasies.
5. In fiction, theater and cinema, I prefer clear plots with a definite beginning, middle and end.
6. A good organization can only be called one in which everyone clearly understands their responsibilities and it is clear who is responsible for what.
7. Everything has its place, and everything should be put in its place.
8. Too much intimacy with other people sometimes scares me.
9. Good parents are always a little kids.
10. I can easily imagine myself as some kind of animal.
11. When something happens to someone close to me, I feel as if it happened to me.
12. Taking on some kind of work, I do not like to be bound by a plan of action, but in many ways I follow my intuition.
13. The characters of my dreams often pass one into another, turn out to be different people.
14. Often it seems to me that I am influenced by extraneous, mysterious forces.
15. It is impossible to draw clear lines between normal people, neurotics and just crazy.
16. I am a down-to-earth, practical, realistic person.
17. By nature I could be a poet, artist, artist.
18. Sometimes I hear that someone is calling me by name, but looking around I do not find anyone.
Now let's calculate the test results.
In your answers to questions No. 1, 2, 3, 4, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 17, 18 put to yourself:
1 point - for answer A,
2 points - for answer B,
3 points - for answer C,
4 points - for the answer D,
5 points - for the answer E.
We evaluate the answers to questions No. 5, 6, 7 and 16 according to the reverse scheme:
5 points - for answers A,
4 points - for answers B,
3 points - for answers C,
4 points - for answers D
5 points - for answers E.
Results:
- the average person with average "boundaries" usually gains 35 points;
- 50 or more points - your barriers are too thin;
- 20 or less - too fat.
You can learn more about the boundaries of a safe personal space from a psychologist - it is still individual for each person.
/ Illustration from the site pravnet.com/
